Pink or Blue???

Well, tomorrow is the BIG day. We have our 16 week sonogram with the perinatologist in the morning. He is going to do an in depth sono and measure all of the babies organs (heart, brain, kidneys, etc.). I am, in one word, terrified. I know that I shouldn't, but I can't help worrying that there could be something wrong. Given my history as a PICU nurse, I now realize what a blessing it is to have a healthy baby. Congenital heart anomaly, diaphragmatic hernia, polycystic kidneys, hydrocephalus, trisomy 21, trisomy 18, trisomy 13, trisomy any other number, omphalocele - these are all terms that I DO NOT want to hear tomorrow. I've seen families struggle to help their ill children, and I just pray that the Lord sees it fit to bless us with a healthy baby. I am absolutely petrified when I think about the possibilities of what could come out of that doctor's mouth tomorrow. If you get a chance, say a little prayer for us tomorrow at 9:15am. I'll try to post a full report tomorrow.

The only thing that has taken my mind off of the doom and gloom thoughts that I have is the possibility of finding out the sex of the baby tomorrow. The perinatologist told me at 12 weeks that he should be able to determine the gender at my 16 week appointment, and you better believe that I am going to hold him to it! I really, really, really think that it is another boy. Which would be great, of course. Wade and I layed in bed the other night and I rambled on for 10 minutes about all the pros of each gender. Here is the list that I came up with:

Boy Pros
* We already have TONS of boy stuff. I would love to be able to use all of those precious clothes that Clayton wore again. Plus, we would save a lot of money.
* Clayton would have a brother! It seems to me that same sex siblings tend to be closer (I know there are exceptions, of course). Also, I have never seen brothers interact first-hand. I have a sister, Wade has a sister, most of my girlfriends have sisters, etc. I think it would be fun to see two little boys grow up together.
* I would never have to deal with all the "joys" of raising an adolescent girl. I was SO horrible as a pre-teen/teenager. Oh my goodness - it makes me cringe to think about how awful I was to my mom. I can't imagine being on the receiving end of all those mood swings and hormones.
* I would get to remain the "Queen of my Castle." I sort of like that feeling of being the only girl in the house. Wade and Clayton are both so sweet to me and make a point of telling me that I look beautiful, etc. It sure would be hard to share that limelight with someone else. :)

Girl Pros
* Dresses, bows, tights, black patent leather Mary Janes, headbands, barrettes - need I say more? It would be sooo fun to dress a little girl. (It could be a very bad thing for my marriage, however. I can already hear the, "You spent how much on that?!?!?" coming from Wade.) I absolutely adore smocked dresses! My Mom made us several as children, which she saved (thank goodness). I would love to be able to dress my little girl in them as well.
* We already have a girl name, but can not seem to come to an agreement on a boy name. I could avoid buying a Baby Names book if the baby is a girl.
* Dance lessons, piano lessons, gymnastics, and ballet. These are all lessons that I took as a little girl. I was not particularly good at any of them, but there sure were some cute little costumes that went along. I'd like to think, also, that it made me a more cultured/well-rounded person. (For the record, I still remember all the ballet positions. Makes you feel better about your investment, huh Mom?)
* I would get to be the Mother of the Bride one day. How fun is that going to be?!?! To get to help plan another wedding - that would be awesome. I can imagine taking my little girl to pick out her wedding dress, flowers, photographer, etc. (As a side note, I just thought of another pro to having a boy: I wouldn't have to pay for a wedding. he he he)

After my rant about all the benefits of having a baby of each gender, I concluded by saying, "I just can't decide which one I would rather have. I want both!" Wade quickly responded, "Well, it is a good thing that you don't have to decide. The decision is already made!"

One thing is for sure, I will be content with whatever news we receive tomorrow. Whether the baby is "healthy" or has some sort of birth defect and whether the baby is a boy or a girl - I will be content. That is what I know.

(Side note: Clayton is pretty sure that the baby is a girl. He talks about his baby sister all the time. Whenever we see a baby girl at the grocery store, Clayton will say, "Mommy, I want you to have that baby!")